It was tempting to look for other women who might be receptive, but I thought that entering a relationship with a middle-aged woman could be a risky endeavor since I didn’t want my marriage to end badly. I still loved Kendra, and I was just looking for sexual relief in the safest way possible. I’m a well-educated and perceptive guy, and I began to realize that my identification with the cuckold characters in those stories was exposing some bisexual or even homosexual propensities in my character, that I never knew about previously. Maybe that was because of my small dick, but I was deriving great sensual pleasure in reading those stories, and imagining myself as a submissive, cock sucking husband, who gets off on sucking those larger cocks that are described so well that I could almost taste them.Īll of the submissive feelings I was having made me want to find a man to suck, but I didn’t know where to begin. I knew that I didn’t have any attraction to men, per se, and didn’t want to be romantically involved with them, and didn’t even care how they looked.
To me, it was just about the sexual relief I thought I could get by providing oral service to other men.